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Showing posts from June, 2017

Oh, My Gosh Johnny Depp. Shut it.

Johnny Depp now says he shouldn't have joked about actors assassinating presidents, a joke that, surprisingly, went all lead dirigible in a shit tornado to Oz just as someone flicks a Bic. You know its going to end and you know it's going to stink, but there's still the question of wardrobe. We're hoping he'll trot out soon wearing one of a kind creations from the Salon Sanguinaria, halfway past Marfa, at the border of Sugarland.

Sarah Palin Fakes Another Pregnancy -- Nobody Notices

Alaska's former pageant governor and Down's Syndrome fetishizer , Sarah Palin's stock has fallen, even with the rîz of the Clown King, which is the raison de raison of her next intended spawn who was, at election time, already a bun ready to pop from another oven and boasting genetic anomola. The current administration has room for only one drama queen, however, so she'd better be careful of hanging too long by the telephone, lest she miss a call from one of her business partners in a thinktank for "conservative" propaganda to be funded by the beauty products industry by way of inline clickbait advert-education. This is the way that advertizers now prefer to think of their product-- as part of a larger narrative that implies a certain lifestyle, and even alludes to the values of God and Family that one might seek by alignment with the brand to project as a part of your own personal brand. Okay, so they were always doing that, but the actual deterrirorializa...

Kim Kardashian Intergalactic Entertainment Robot Hologram

A certain "reality" creature who, it is well known in certain circles, recently had to have its ass implants replaced after a too vigorous a performance on a "secret" sex video. Of course the video was "anonymously" released to the wilds of the internets at the end of the season to provide fodder for a probable "marriage crisis" next season and the Kardashians are busily adjusting their manicure schedules to accommodate Kim's ass fluctuations. Nobody's sure if a nude nail is better with flat ass or if a pop of color wouldn't offer more of a counterweight, or something. The timing for release of the "sex" "tape" couldn't have been more fortunate, coming, as it did during the same week in which reports surfaced that Kim Kardashian is actually a holographic emanation of the CIA which is the product of an artificial intelligence program. The Kardashian Klan, it would seem,